everyone's out to get me

11 comments

Posted February 7th, 2009 by julek

For some time now, I've had this feeling that everyone wants to see me dead. They are all looking at me in school, and pointing at me. The few people I've told say I'm crazy, and that it's all in my head. I hate being told I'm paranoid, but it's the truth. I make things up in my head and then live after them as rules. Just the other day I was about to go to lunch in school. But I couldn't, because after two seconds in the queue I heard this voice in my head screaming: DON'T GO IN, THEY ALL HATE YOU!
IF YOU GO IN AND TALK WITH PEOPLE THEY'LL KILL YOU!
So instead I ran into the bathroom, where I started to cry hysterically. I sat in there for forty minutes until I finally got the courage to come out. I didn't realize that my makeup was ruined until FIVE minutes later when my teacher asked me if I had any foundation with me. I know that you all think I'm making this up, but I'm not. It's the truth. I'm a paranoid girl whose makeup's always ruined.

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On February 7th, 2009
dohickey said:

seriously, we all go through that (even us over-40's). if it's really keeping you from enjoying life and being productive, talk to a counselor or doctor about talking through it or maybe xanax (after all a huge number of people take it safely for just that)

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On February 8th, 2009
GossipGirl said:

Honey everyone is not out to get you...they might notice that you act a little strange so thats why they point. Only you create your own fears, thats whats holding you back from living life to the fullest. Stop crying, buy some waterproof make up dont listen to that voice in your head saying that they hate you...because its wrong. Be the girl that you want to be and fuck everything your lil jimmeny cricket is telling you because honestly its wrong.
XoXo Gossip Girl

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On February 11th, 2009
Shy said:

I totally agree with you. She also needs some depression meds and needs to talk to someone, and if she has no one to talk to or a councelor that will listen then I will. Im a very good listener and am able to help people in her situation.

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On February 9th, 2009
Shy said:

I agree with dohickey, you should really go see a counselor or psychologist. You don't necessarily have to take any anti-anxiety or anti-depression meds, because there are a lot of different therapies you can do that will help you through the torments of high school. When I was going through high school I had some of the same experiences you did. When I would walk down the halls it would feel as though everyone was pointing, talking and laughing about me, but in reality I wasn't anywhere on their minds. I was so insecure with myself that my brain made it seem like everyone was looking at me as if I was a freak. It took a huge push from my parents to seek help but I eventually saw both a psychologist and psychiatrist and found out that I suffered from depression and social anxiety. The doctor was able to speak with my school and I was home tutored for a year until I was well enough to face the kids at school. That was almost 10 years ago when I was diagnosed and I don't have any social anxiety issues anymore. At least none that interfere with my day to day life. Do yourself a favor and seek professional help, it will do you a world of good.

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On March 12th, 2009
Shy said:

I used to have it really bad like you. To the point where everyone but me was psychic and could read my thoughts like I was some fucked up radio transistor. Hang in there and seek help as soon as possible.

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On May 21st, 2010
Hard_2_Get said:

I'm not saying you're crazy, but you need help. I suffer from anxiety, not anywhere near as severe as you, but I'm telling you that you'll feel so much better after seeking professional help.

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