Hi Im married but recently i got in touch w/my ex who is the father of my son.wr chatting all the time and i realize im more happy chatting w/him them spending time w/ my husband. i wanna win him back but how?
My husband doesnt wanna have kids coz he cant handle responsibilities he said.his a very negative guy i dont know where me and my son's future will be w/him. my ex was a good man i regret the time i left him.i want him back he told me ones if we could bring back time so we can change what happened. we both live in 2 diff. countries what can i do?there is no divorce in the country wr i got married. please help me.
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worrywort said:
TOTALLY separATE THE 2 ISSUES --- your ex is an illusion, and live contact would show it. kill that mentally, and judge your marriage onm its own. THEN, go forward, either way
Shy said:
The time once gone is gone.
Discussions always work.. Speak with your husband. try making him positive towards life. go on a vacation at super cool places.
Your ex is your history which you must forget now if you dont want to piss on your future.
Maybe you havent understood your husband yet... Maybe he is better than your Ex.....
Try it and you will have a beautiful future.
Sad_Gal said:
I tried talking to him but we just argue, i always tell him maybe we can go somewhere for a change so we can relax and travel the both of us then he will say ok, then after a week or a month i will remind him to prepare he suddenly say we should save its a waste of money etc... so i just keep quiet. Everyday all i hear from him is life is shit i don't know what will happen in the future, he just wants to run away were no 1 will find him he doesn't need to work etc. Im trying to understand him i really am it's just sometimes i need to think of my kid's future. if didn't have a kid i can ride w/his No future plan. but i cant, my kid goes first. Do i make sense?
Shy said:
I'm in same situation but I left my daughters father and had two children with my husband. We've only been married two years. I realize now that I was happier with my ex and I left him for dumb reasons. We were together 9 years and have a great daughter together. He was so good to me. My husband is too but we don't have as much fun together or as much in common. I hate my life right now because I'm not in love with my husband but feel stuck cuz now I have three kids. When my ex picks my daughter up I wanna go hang out with them. It's sad and mostly cuz I did this to myself. I ruined my life. If u were u since you don't have children with your husband I would leave him, that's if your really not in love. Why waste your life away? I wish I could go back. Good luck
Sad_Gal said:
Thank you all for your comments. I am thinking about it really carefully cause this is my life and ones i make a decision there is no turning back. And i don't want regrets anymore.
Recently i found out my ex is courting some 1 else, but he told me the girl doesn't seems interested in him. when i first heard that i felt numbed for 2mins. i pretended it didnt bother me i deleted it in my head. I guess what i felt for my ex is just infatuation? I dunno... since I'm longing for my husband to be sweet to be loving to care for me w/c i never get from my husband.It's like wr not married if i dont have money i need to say can i borrow money cause im broke. we half everything and sometimes he talks if i cant afford to pay cable or my credits i mean we are husband and wife we should be one right everything should be "US". i dunno... im so confuse and so alone.
Shy said:
Check this out... Remember what happened first. You got bored/unapealed/tired of you ex and then you did this thing called break up with him. Guess what, it's not a one time deal. You can totally do it again. Not saying you should, or that you wouldn't be wasting your time, but at least you'd be honest with everybody about what you are feeling. Were I your Ex of course, I wouldn't take you back right away, you may have clearly broken my heart the first time, and you only prove that you are still the same person by doing it again to another man, but you'd be out of the marriage you hate; and clearly you do hate being in it, or you wouldn't be contemplating this openly on the internet. So yeah, the decision is up to you. Perhaps if you get married again, you should strongly consider the term death do you part before saying you do.
Heck, if I were you I'd even try counseling before rationing out that you want to end it. But maybe you are too weak to attempt such a feat, in which case you should get out of this marriage, cause you are just wearing down the both of you.
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